There’s been too much going on for meÂ to write these last few days.Â Or maybe I’ve been to tired to do it.Â Or both.
With that in mind, I’ll say that Spring has flung itself on central Illinois rather early this year.Â The seventies are a magical temperature; one or two days of that warmth and little green sprouts appear everywhere.Â In fact, this might be one of the only St. Patrick’s days I can remember where there was an abundance of clover on the ground.
In honor of the warm weather, I went for a hike in the woods, something IÂ enjoy immensely.Â The pleasure of walking in the woods is hard to define: it’s not a feeling of solitude that fills me when I walk the narrow path between trees; on the contrary, it feels like I’m right at home.Â The trees remind me of people, like I’m walking through a crowd.Â Only these people aren’t doing anything; their only duty is to exist.Â I think that’s what I like about them- if humans like me just tried existing for awhile, without appointments or distractions, without emotion, without thought, life might not feel so overwhelming.
So I tried it.
I tried to just exist in the woods- I didn’t talk, hum, sing, or create any other disturbance.Â I also tried not thinking, but that turns out to be really difficult, since the act of willing yourself not to think takes a conscious effort.Â Instead, I tried to only think about my surroundings, and forget about the past and future.Â Emotion was out too, but that’s not as difficult to supress as thought.Â Practiced meditators might be able to suspend thought and emotion, and verge on tree-like, but not me.
Instead, I tried to behave like an animal; not devoid of thought, but ignoring things that aren’t immenently affecting me.Â For a couple of hours, I resigned from my responsibilities as homo-sapiens, master of the Earth.Â It didn’t last, as you might have guessed, but it was interesting at the time.